Cool Cat

Mishearing song lyrics is a common phenomenon. There's actually a word for a garbled lyric: mondegreen. And there are books about it, such as Gavin Edwards' When a Man Loves a Walnut--I'm actually a contributor (my name's in the credits and everything!). One example: I always thought Cat Stevens (that's him proudly showing off his denim-clad junk in the pic) was singing "Morning is broken," not "Morning has broken." That song was playing when I picked up my triple venti nonfat latte at Starbucks today, and it proved to be prophetic, so in the tradition of Weird Al, I composed new lyrics to the Stevens hit.

Morning is broken
My laptop won't start up
Got no cell signal
The router is dead
Clients are pissed
Deadlines will be missed
Screw all this bullshit
I'm back in bed.